Manah Siksa 1+2 Astaratha Das ACBSP O mind, if you want to be my friend, Then please don't go away Even for a moment, from the memory That maintains a sisya's life Let me dwell at the doorstep of my master's house Let me serve him without stopping, without end Let me feel the safety of being in his lotus hand O mind, run swiftly towards Srila Prabhupad To you, o carriage of the soul, distance is of no importance Please run back to 1896, And see the mud-walled house under the jackfruit tree Remember mother Rajani and Gour Mohan De The humble cloth merchant, the most fortunate one Begging the sadhus to pray to Radha for his son O mind, bring me to Radha-Govinda at Harrison Road, To the small garden at his grandmother's house Let me see his tiny hands learning to play the mrdanga And let me follow his father walking with him for miles To the bank of the Ganga Yes, you can think of eating If this brings about sweet memories Of little Abhay and kacoris, kacoris O mind, go back to school And see him sitting amongst four others in a row At the long wooden desks at Motilal's Remember him ride his bicycle down the busy Calcutta streets And never forget his childhood Ratha-yatra Distributing prasadam to whomever he meets O mind, soon the bell rings for Scottish Churches' College The priestly teachers, the Bible, the challenge on karma, the role of Advaita Acarya Rehearsing more for one year The Britishers, Gandhi, khadi and swaraj, The end of college, the beginning of business And family career O mind, bring me up to the rooftop of Ultadanga 1 (https://deturl.com/play.php?v=CopLUmIMBpo) Where the very nice saintly person is sitting straight Defeating Abhay with sastra and reason Telling him in an instance what he should do: "Go, all over the world and preach The divine message of Mahaprabhu" O mind, just calm down and reflect for a moment On this highly significant meeting And consider the outcome, after so many years "Somehow, by the will of Krishna we met; Who knew," Srila Prabhupada used to say, "Of Krishna's arrangement, His inconceivable way?" O mind, you can never fathom these ways of destiny Why was he tied up with family duties Changing locations and business affairs Why could he not go then And fulfill his master's order, Lord Caitanya's prophecy O mind, let's go on to Allahabad's Prayag Pharmacy Remember the photo after Gour Mohan passed away Remember the brahmacaris of nearby Gaudiya Math Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati, the initiation fire And remember why to him he was so dear Remember his remark: "Yes, he likes to hear" O mind, please run towards Srila Prabhupad He has gone to Bombay now Trying to develop his own business there Don't be bewildered by this worldly sight Soon you will see Krishna's plan behind Who could say it was an accident, That he saw again the Gaudiya Math sannyasis Now they made a team to preach Recall the poem and the Vyasa-puja speech And the order of his Guru Maharaj: "Whatever he writes - print it!" O mind, carry me into the November of 1935 To Vrindavan, the sacred bank of Radha-kund Where Abhay hears these prophetic words: "Amar iccha chila, kichu bai karana" - "If you ever get money, print books!" What is the use of bricks and buildings, What is the use of fighting over rooms? O mind, "Godhead is light - nescience is darkness" Was the greeting to the readers Of his Back to Godhead magazine And Back to Godhead was the forum for Abhay The preacher, the writer, the philosopher Remember the world in 1944 The starvation, the war, the crisis So many efforts gone in vain And remember Abhay writing and hoping At 6 Sita-kanta Banerjee Lane O mind, listen to his preaching to the leaders Who were too far gone to hear his voice The letter to Gandhi was of no avail India set out to make its place among the nations Hindu-Muslim riots, confusion at every place Little did they care about his saving grace Destiny took him to the small town of Jhansi A new hope for Abhay and new attempt "The League of Devotees" painted in big letters outside the Radha Memorial ambitiously There was an inauguration ceremony, a disciple made But Jhansi - no, it was not supposed to be "Yasyaham anugrhnami" - Abhay began to laugh Seven thousand rupees lost The final end to business struggle The "tea-or-me" story took place May the family survive somehow He is ready for vanaprastha now O mind, let us pass through New Delhi's wilderness The difficult years, as Prabhupad called them later The Gaudiya sangha wasn't meant for him Although he tried his best to get the place together His plans for printing were called "too big and lofty" His ideas attractive but no money was inside And his assistants all too neophyte Homeless, he moved around in Delhi No, he did not give up He made a list of books to publish Looking for donors here and there He stayed at the houses of Hindu gentlemen Gradually bringing back to life his BTG Now he had a voice again To call into Kali-yuga's dark The world is in need of the brilliant sun How much could he accomplish with a glowing spark? O mind, please run towards Srila Prabhupad Distributing his Back to Godhead In that boiling summer city Remember how he starts reeling Because of the heat How he was charged by a stray cow In a secluded street O mind, take me to Vrindavan Take me to his room near Keshi Ghat Take me to the sounds of temple bells and kirtan Take me to his early morning hours His japa and his writing Take me to his meditation at pre-dawn "I am sitting alone in Vrindavan Dham; In this mood I'm getting many realizations. I have my wife, sons, daughters, grandsons, everything but I have no money, so they are a fruitless glory. Krishna has shown me the naked form of material nature. By His strength it has all became tasteless to me today." Remember that morning of September 17, 1959 The second floor of Mathura's Keshavaji Math He was reluctant to do it, "unwillingly," he said But his Godbrother convinced him with force: "Take sannyas" - that was the will of his master That was the will of the spiritual world Remember him standing with danda in hand Meant to spread Krishna's words to every land Remember him going Vrindavan-Delhi, back and forth The brilliant sun for the world began to rise Srila Prabhupad prepared his work on the Bhagavatam The Gosvamis gave him a place at Radha-Damodar And soon he got a place in Delhi too The best location for printing volume one Still, he was alone, all by himself And so much needed to be done O mind, little did these simple printers know Why this Swami worked so hard To get his books done speedily What did they know of Swami's dream The driving force behind his actions How could they know how treasured his books would be And that he would take them soon across the sea Yes, New York - that was his cherished dream Just think of the struggle that was in-between Think of Sumati Morarji's Jaladuta, The P-form and the sponsorship Think of his lifelong preparation, His determination beyond bounds Until finally he goes onboard Fully protected by the Lord O mind, glorify him day and night Remember him at every sight Renounce that fear of worldly blame Your hankering for prestige and fame Forever flow, just like a river Towards this great mercy-giver Bow down, bow down, recite his name Bow down, bow down, recall his love For all the living entities For all of them, for all of them he came O mind, o mind, deliver me Deliver me to his lotus feet Bring me across this mighty ocean No matter how long the journey takes Bring me to my eternal master Despite countless allurements on the way Please don't deceive me, please hear what I say O mind, bring me to Scindia office in Bombay Remember Srila Prabhupada's determination To obtain free passage on the Jaladuta Sumati Morarji and her deep concern: "O Swamiji, stay here in India, you are too old. How will you endure America and its winter cold?" O mind, think of his words full of prophecy While he lifted his hands in reassurance: "It is all right" Dispelling the doubts of the wondering Scindia crew Who couldn't understand Bhaktivedanta's case Who thought he was going there to die At this far-off Western place Still, he had to get the P-form And he didn't have his U.S. visa yet Think of Srila Prabhupad waiting patiently In an empty apartment, only with his trunk, His typewriter, and the order of his Guru Maharaj Think of him being honored at the Scindia colony Receiving rice, subji, fruits in plenty Think of the reply to... [unclear] The time is still not right, the time is still not right "My mission was printed on a flyer page To convince some influential businessman Of the remedy for this fallen age Of Bhagavad-gita, Srimad Bhagavatam Convince him of Prabhupad's brilliant scope To spread India's real glory all over the globe." O mind, remember his encounter with the bank And that P-form drama there Let me wait with Prabhupad for Mr. Rao Sparing no anxiety at this last Maya test But behind it all was Krishna's grace Mr Rao came to tell him personally: "Swamiji, don't worry, I have passed your case." Departure's final date was set for 13th of August Blackish Jaladuta waiting at Calcutta's pier For the Vrindavan sadhu who had no fear Little did Mrs. Morarji know What her cargo ship would set to motion O mind, thank her for this pious act Meant to make the world again intact The few days left before departure He arrived in the city of his youthful times Gone were his loving father, sisters, sons A homeless sannyasi, a mendicant, socially dead Was getting ready to cross the ocean To show to the world Lord Gauranga's glory A small Bengali newspaper printed his story O mind, hold on forever to this empowered soul Be with him on the way to Mayapur Where he bows down before his eternal master To obtain reassurance and exchange of love A final blessing and permission And last confirmation of his irreversible decision O mind, please help me to dive deep Into that most precious moment Help me to fathom in confidence their spiritually sweet relationship The servant and his order-giver Making him the world deliverer O mind, bow down to him, bow down to him Who took Bhaktisiddhanta's order to his heart Who broke all ties of mundane bondage Who had Krishna as his companion at his side Yes, he was ready now to preach worldwide Remember his small suitcase, His umbrella and his supply of cereal That how he walked on-board, alone Carrying with him Caitanya-caritamrta There were no supporters, disciples, relatives Waving their hands from the shore No one knew how the crossing would end Except Lord Krishna, his most dear friend Take me onboard to him, o mind Let the fusty Jaladuta cabin be the foundation For my attempt of Prabhupad meditation Let me leave behind the shore of sense illusion Crossing over the ocean, free of all confusion Let me be there with captain Pandia and his wife O mind, for that memory I strive Take me to Srila Prabhupad as he endures pain Of sea-sickness, dizziness and stomach trouble As he encounters heavy rains over Bengal's Bay Till he arrives at Sri Lanka to get relief Taken around Colombo by the captain in a car Far from Vrindavan, far from Radha-Damodar If I could only taste the prasad he cooked On that 20th of August, Janmastami day If I could hear him speaking to the crew About Sri Krishna's teachings, eternally new If I could just reverse the wheel of time Be near him as his seventieth birthday passes, Uncelebrated, not at all attention drawing If I could feel a fraction only Of the unshakable faith in his Lord's divine will Could any doubt be remaining with me still? At Kochin harbor the trunks were waiting Shipped as a special cargo load Two hundred sets of his three-volume Canto One Thinking of the books gave him confidence Of all sastras - the one of topmost prominence Now setting out for the mleccha reader Along with Prabhupad to make them eager O mind, think of blackish Jaladuta as it puts out to the Red Sea Carrying Srila Prabhupad to those crucial days That made him encounter the unbearable pains in his chest - he thought he would die Two heart attacks in two days He survived somehow, alone in the endless sea The pure devotee's tolerance - the great mystery On the night of the second day Krishna showed him His many forms Rowing in a boat, reassurance giving that he needn't have any fear "Come along, fulfill your mission, under My protection you won't fail." This was the dream he had that night - Of Krishna rowing the boat on the sea Relieving the miseries of His dear devotee When Jaladuta entered the Suez Canal He slowly recovered his health And was eating for the first time in two weeks Kichari and puris, cooked by himself His report in the diary speaks of renewed strength As the crossing continues, shortening its length O mind, reflect forever on his voyage's struggle Go deep inside its meaning Hearing of the seeming obstacles Is a most intense and thorough cleaning O mind, take away those clouds of sense desire For the nectarean life of Caitanya-caritamrta The source of Prabhupad's vitality For that inspiration only I aspire Let there be pains of bodily existence My success or failure in this world What does it matter, let there be calamities But bring me close to Srila Prabhupad Who takes away all my anxieties Friday, September 10th, 1965: "Today the ship is plying very smoothly," He comments with humility, "today I feel better But I'm feeling separation from Sri Vrindavan And my Lords - Sri Govinda, Gopinath, Radha-Damodar" O mind, let that day come when I shall fathom What feeling separation means When I will step over Maya's border To execute his transcendental order Just as he did to show us all the way To depend fully on Their mercy In every situation, day after day Remember how he stood at the ship's rail Watching the ocean and the sky Remember how his mind was dwelling On preaching to the so-called human beings With their advanced technology, Their speeding cars, non-stop TV Take lessons, again and again from his unshakable faith He kept deep in his heart The goodwill of Lord Krishna was on his side Who caused the Atlantic's rough face to hide Who had taken charge of the ship Allowing His empowered servant to complete the trip Even now we can read that prayer poem Disclosing his thoughts to his dearmost companion Lord Krishna, the benefactor of all O mind, allow me to reach such absorption Though I am still distant, most unqualified I beg you to surrender, please fix the direction Don't go astray any longer Let me feel helpless at his feet There is nothing else I need Thirty five days on sea have passed 5:30 AM on September 17th The ship stopped briefly at Commonwealth Pier Painted large on a warehouse wall: A and P Among America's first things To greet the pure devotee From the grey waterfront down the harbor's ships and lobster stands The drab buildings, the skyscrapers of the New World appear And Srila Prabhupad praying to his dearmost Lord: "I do not know why you have brought me here" He passes through customs and U.S. Immigration His visa allows him a three-month stay, stated officially Captain Pandia walks with him into Boston To show him what American life will be And Srila Prabhupad praying to his dearmost Lord: "Now you can do whatever you like with me" Helplessly he spoke his heart to God: "I wish that you may deliver them; By Your will they can be released From the clutches of illusion" He has come to plant the seed Telling them to stop illicit sex, intoxication, Gambling, fish eating, eggs and meat As an eternal Vrindavan resident He has come to give them what they need He has come to preach real love, not lust And what it really means "In God We Trust" O mind, follow this sannyasi Who set his foot into New York, alone Wondering whether to turn left or right Carrying forty rupees in his pocket "The few hours's spending," as he later says O mind, remember forever these historical days Dwell in his footprints, big enough for all They are my only shelter Not narrow but wide, all-accommodating No need for going outside O mind, don't drag me away from his mercy Help me to make his instructions the solid base for my life Folding my hands before you like a beggar I go on pleading till the end of my years: Let me be with Srila Prabhupad Let me be with him - wherever he appears